Dear Molly: Some people like to have a few beers when they play. Well, sorry, I like to smoke. But I can see players giving me the stink eye, and that makes me uncomfortable. Any ideas about how I can keep doing what I enjoy without alienating my companions?
You probably have heard that smoking on the golf course is dangerous. You could start a fire! Oh, and one more thing: It could kill you! But, as you note, we all have our guilty pleasures. At one course I used to play in California, the highlight of the round came at the turn shack in the decadent form of a milkshake that returned to us every calorie we had just burned. And yes, it was spiked, generously.
But my companions weren’t going to get fat because I drank the milkshake. You just happen to have one of those guilty pleasures that can have an impact on the people around you, some of whom may be in the process of walking five or six miles and therefore place a high value on fresh air. It’s a little bit like blasting your music when companions would prefer to hear the birds sing. So for starters, I suggest you review Music Manners for the Course for etiquette pointers. And check out Cart Etiquette for Strangers.
The very best option in every case is to invite three like-minded friends to play with you. Three smokers aren’t going to mind that you’re polluting their air. Or at least be upfront about your vice when you put together or join a foursome, so players have a choice.
But suppose it’s league play, and foursomes are assigned? Or you and a pal are taking your chances on a random pairing during a weekend round? I would try these strategies to head off any discomfort:
Generally be upfront about your smoking when meeting players at the first tee. Apologize, ask if there are any objections, concerns or allergies, and state that you will make every effort not to encroach. Then, heed the wind.
Include, “Are you OK if I smoke? I’ll take care to blow it out the side,” when paired randomly in a cart. If the person expresses severe discomfort at this, consider not smoking while in the cart or requesting a different pairing.
Do not take your cigar, pipe or cigarette to the putting surface. There is not enough space there for players to move away from your smoke or for you to ensure your smoke is not encroaching.
Do not litter the course or toss buds or stubs recklessly.
Of course, you may take all these measures and still get the stink eye from someone with the unwavering belief that no one should ever smoke in their presence. You can try to extricate yourself from the foursome if it’s a recreational round, but if it’s league play I suggest you simply accept it and find pleasure in your game and the rest of your group.
Now please excuse me. My blender is calling, there’s a milkshake to be spiked.
Do you have a question about golf etiquette, golf relationships or the culture of golf in Colorado? Email it to Molly McMulligan, the CGA’s on-the-course advisor on how to have more fun on the golf course, and follow @MollyMcMulligan on Instagram. Her creator, researcher and writer is golf journalist and CGA member Susan Fornoff.
